12 Aug Dating Your Boo While Married To Hubby
So listen, this isn’t a judgemental post; I don’t rock that way. However, this post will be honest. I’ve had conversations with my girlfriends about this very topic and they know I don’t support their decisions. I love them, but I don’t support mess.
A woman should not be dating a man (or multiple men) if she is separated. If divorce papers haven’t been signed by both parties, stamped by a judge and filed, then you are still married. Separated means apart; it doesn’t mean “not married.”
Ladies, please get your personal stuff situated before you bring a man into your mess…let me also say that God isn’t going to bless your mess either. This whole “dating while separated” has me perplexed and I have questions:
Why are you still separated and it’s been fifty-eleven years?
If you know you won’t be getting back together, why haven’t you filed for a divorce?
If you start dating and fall madly in love and your boo wants to marry you, but you are still legally married…How? How Sway? Now you expect him to wait for several months—possibly a year or longer for you to get your stuff right? No ma’am.
Is this how you want to start a new relationship?
Tell me…how is this honoring God? I’ll wait.
I can’t stress this enough, but it’s imperative that you release the old before you welcome the new. In addition, whether you have been separated for 2 months or 2 years, have you taken the time to heal? Do you recognize how you contributed to your marriage ending? Don’t be in a such a rush to find someone to fill in the gap of loneliness. When you are separated from your spouse, there are emotional adjustments that need to be made. Those emotions are often heightened when you go through the process of Divorce.
The process of Divorce tends to bring out the ugliness in people and some find themselves having to clean up emotional debris…one can’t do this effectively if your sights and emotions are already focused on another person. You will find yourself entering into a place of denial where you will sweep your emotional issues under the rug rather than dealing with them. What many of us fail to realize is that when we find ourselves dealing with a familiar and uncomfortable situation with the new boo, the rug has a tendency to be snatched from under our feet, exposing our emotional debris. And again I ask, “Is this how you want to start a new relationship?”
Please end the old before you begin the new. Take time to adjust, heal and figure out what’s best for you…without a side boo whispering in your ear.
From my heart to yours,